5 reasons why I started persianbrunette or oversharing my life on the internet

Sometimes we found ourselves so caught up in something that we tend to forget why we started it in the first place. The last years have been full of long and intense business readings and truth to be told: I think I’m not even able to tell you about 10% of them. However, there is a concept that kept coming back over and over again that has been stuck in my head ever since I saw it for the first time.

In order to bring any project to life: You need a strategy. Thinking about What your project is going to be? How are you going to bring it to life? But most importantly: Why are you bringing it to life? Okay, I swear the rest of the post will be less academic, let’s just not forget that I am currently writing a thesis and that the writing style just get stuck to my fingers. Even If I already talked about it in one of my videos, I thought it would be good to tell you my Why, the essence of persianbrunette as it might be completely misinterpreted. There are so many reasons nowadays people start being “public personalities”: Need of popularity, need of success, need to share their love for something specific, need to express themselves, money and so many more. In fact, all of them are perfectly acceptable and there is no need to classify anyone or any venture as evil or good.

People might think oh the girl just went nuts: Publishing pictures of herself on Social media and the internet, and honestly that is exactly the reaction I was afraid 9 months ago when I published my first picture on Instagram. I was afraid of so many things and the experience turned out to be more incredible than what I what I ever expected. People have been so nice to me, supporting me since the beginning, giving me strength when I was lacking from it. So here are my five reasons why, hope you enjoy babes.

1.This little guy and my friends have been my rock

To say that I am lucky is an understatement, I am everyday grateful to be surrounded by such inspiring and amazing people. It started with Darius, my baby bro, that has been telling me for years that I needed to do something about my passion about fashion, my love of writing and my over bubbly personality. Darius and I were raised to love each other unconditionally, it surely was tough in the beginning as we almost killed each other everyday but some things happened in our lives during the last years that have made us inseparable. When I was having a rough time last December, he was determined in getting me out of this and told me that we would do this project together and that it would be amazing because I would be finally doing everything I always wanted to do. And that was it, he started taking pictures of me even when mad at me, even when he was in a rush, even if i was wearing the most horrifying outfit ever. He gave me idea of the content I could start creating and he is the one who had the idea of this post: you can tell he is my inspiration in everything I decide to do.

Then I started sharing on social media without telling anyone but my closest friends which have been a constant support in that adventure. Sometimes people of my school would fall on my Instagram page or I would meet people I know and they would tell me “Hey I can see you are really motivated with the whole Insta thing”. Yeah. I am. It became clear to me that people wouldn’t understand why I was doing this and I wasn’t ready to share the reasons why yet. It is not until two days ago that I allowed my social circles on Facebook to get to know about it because I didn’t want to be judged for a bunch of pictures I could post. So many times, being a fashion lover is being automatically tied to a superficial and brainless image, and that is a pure shame. Today, I know the most important people in my life fully supports me in whatever I decide to do and I couldn’t have been given a best gift. The rest doesn’t matter, I can be tied to any image you want to tag me to, the ones that truly matter know exactly who I am as a person and that is all care about.

2.I didn’t know who Neguine was anymore

It is sad to say that I couldn’t find her anymore. During the last years it had all been what my parents wanted me to do, what my family expected me to do, what my school recommended me as a carrier path.

At some point, I was rolling with it: Doing a marketing Master and not taking any significant decision about where to take my life next. At 22, it was about time. It is only when I lost one of the most important person in my life that I realized how much everything was messed up. A few months ago I was on top of the world, always happy and confident that things would turned out right. When that happened: I felt lost and I felt like I would not be able reconnect with myself. Its a process, It is tough and I am still working on it.

I remembered that my goal was always fashion but realized there was some things I want more than that. But you truly can’t have it all and maybe it’s all just a question of timing or maybe not but in the moment, I had to focus on the things I could have rather on waiting for the things that wouldn’t be given to me right away.

3. I became to be terribly blasée and frustrated about my academic situation

I thought one more year in Business and Marketing would allow me to figure out what I wanted to do next. In my head it was like: “Okay, one more year is not that much. You are gonna learn a lot of stuff, meet a lot of people and have tons of fun”. That wasn’t it. Yes, I learnt a lot of stuff but I didn’t enjoy it like you are supposed to. I felt that the year was passing slowly, way slower than the past four years. Graduating in the Bachelor was the greatest satisfaction I had ever experimented in my entire life, I worked my ass off to stay in that school and finishing the degree was this personal challenge I had set to prove that I could do anything I wanted to. I felt so proud of myself and I don’t think such a feeling could ever be reproduced.

However in the masters, it seemed that I couldn’t feel satisfied and proud anymore. Maybe it’s the people, maybe it’s me, maybe it’s the school or maybe it had to do because I was once again stuck in someone else’s reality. Who knows. I don’t regret doing it, I have met wonderful people and it made me realize a lot of things like that the fun that people usually expect to have in that kind of experience isn’t the fun I was seeking for. Pretty much felt like an alien all the time: But hey, I’m sorry I love chilling in my sweats and eating ice-cream ( Oh my god, huge cliché alert) rather than partying all the time.

4. You gotta start somewhere, and then you will eventually connect the dots

My intention was never to be famous or to have the life of one of those extremely popular bloggers that I have been following for years.

That’s not what I want as a life even though I truly respects the people that choose that as their reality, everyday I see Audrey working like nobody to provide the best content possible. but I needed to somehow connect with Fashion and start doing things related to it. No matter the number of followers I have, no matter how many people end up reading this: I want to stay the same person, evolve from it and be the best version of myself again.

Instagram melts my heart every time, I am astonished by how supportive you all are, I would never thought I would connect that way with people I never met! I am so glad I started on there, I pretty much don’t imagine my life without it now because I love the empowerment women have between each other. Without it I wouldn’t have met so many people virtually and in real life. I don’t know where it will lead me or how it is going to determine the person I will be in the future but I truly believe that the dots will get connected and that I am a Rolls-Royce in the making (haha, you have to know I am being sarcarstic here).

5. I had so much to say

After 5 years in business, I realized something: Just a very few people truly know me as I truly am. Genuinely connecting with people is so difficult when you are tied to a determined context. People tend to categorize you and attach opinions of you depending of how you are doing on this particular context. Was I one of the best students of my promotion? Absolutely not and truth is: I never cared about that.

I have been holding on so much, faked so many smiles, sold a personality that might not actually be coherent with the person I truly am. Part of me actually loves that because that means I actually chose the people I opened up to or that life put some people on my way for a reason. PersianBrunette.com might never be read or go anywhere but that’s the place I have chose to tell my truth and all those things I have been wanting to say for years. Hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

 

Lots of love always,

 

Neguine