About Faking it

So here I am, on what I call my Oh So Pretty shoes that I couldn’t possibly wear on a daily basis because Well, it is simply not what I do.

Proof is, I have spent the last days living in my new pair of Stan Smith: Stan Smith Went to a party, Stan Smith went grocery shopping, Stan Smith wore a little black dress, Stan Smith felt like something a lot more like myself. And since I have been publishing online, it has been all about faking it because somehow that is what we all like to see: cosy sundays reading Vogue and sipping one of these delicious lattes, then kicking mondays with inspiring quotes and finishing the week sweetly with a macaron bite.

And as much as I have loved working harder on my content lately, slowly learning to embellish it to the fullest because it has become an art I love practicing: I tend to forget there is not much more left of me there. Before blogging, I used to disappear when I was not at my best morally, physically or energetically. Simply because I hate people seeing that side of me, I hate to show that flaw, I hate the idea of people even imagining what’s behind the beauty of a sunset shot.

Let’s say that having a blog and being present on social media doesn’t make disappearing that easy, but somehow it is what I needed. I keep asking myself what is worth sharing, if I should be entirely honest to the end, because if that’s the direction I am taking it won’t certainly be the easiest. Just because it is hard to write about feelings, especially for me. But this year is all about growing up, evolving, and maybe sharing that part of me without a doubt making me more vulnerable but somehow stronger. And this is the place where I just promised I wouldn’t fake it, this is the place I promised I would make special: This is the place I want to be as personal as possible, like we are sipping one of those coffee I crave so much together. Let me tell you, if you like coffee, we are already friends.

So to be honest, I have been feeling kind of off lately, exhausted morally, unsatisfied of my body physically, uninspired creatively, tired of that city that has been my home for now 10 years. But if you really want the truth, it is not always going to be amazing, it hasn’t been always amazing. And that’s perfectly fine: we are not supposed to be perfect, neither do our lives, neither do the people we cherish. That’s what we tend to forget, that’s what I tend to forget behind all the embellishment.

So sometimes I might have the strength to tell you part of it, and most of the times, unfortunately, I will put my Oh So Pretty heels on to fake it.

Lots of love always,

Neguine

TODAY I’M WEARING: MANGO blazer // ZARA jeans // Zara Heels // Zara Bag